Living a life I'm proud of

*I do apologize for not posting as diligently as I had in the past. Things have been stressful and overwhelming. I have had to shuffle my priorities a little. I largely write this blog for myself and for my family, and given what has been happening recently, my attention has been directed more towards face to face relationships than online interactions*



What are you proud of?

I'm proud of looking good if I put a lot of effort into my appearance on a given day. I am proud of my academic grades and honours, even when I am not proud of what I've written. I'm proud of a performance at a job interview for a job that I don't actually want. I'm proud of myself for not crying in public when I see something that breaks my heart... I am proud of the things that I change about myself to make myself more appealing in our culture that tells us to: be strong; be competitive; be unique; be beautiful; be fit.

But up to this point in my life I have never seriously reflected on whether or not I am living a life that I am proud of. This year has been a wake up call for me, though. Two of my close family members have been dealing with cancer, my own health has deteriorated, and the stress of losing my thesis has made me really question my commitment to the academy. My personal relationships have suffered a great deal because of these issues. Like many people who go through stressful time I became overwhelmed a took a step back from much of my life. But now I am trying to get back on track, in terms of my health (as I have mentioned before) and in terms of my actual life.

There are many reasons to do your best to live a good, purposeful, and meaningful life. For example, I just read a little article published last year that tells us that living a life with purpose can extend our lives. Now, of course, if your intention in living a life with purpose is to extend your life...that is pretty damn problematic. But on the other hand, realizing that living a purposeful life is really the best way to live should really make you question how you are living your life now.

http://enjoylifeitisthejustone.blogspot.ca/

There is a little post spreading around the internet by the guy who founded Sevenly. He is on a vacation with his family and he tells us:

"Culture tells us to spend an entire year saving for a week to escape our life. We call it vacation. Even as I'm on this incredible road trip across the Northwest with my family, something doesn't feel right. Vacations are meant to be new, they are meant to be fun, but they are not meant to be better than your normal life. I've been all around the world, and I would never trade travel for what I have at home. Life isn't about the 50 vacations you'll take while you're on this planet. It's about the 25,000 days between them. Stop creating a life that you need a vacation from. Instead, move to where you want to live, do what you want to do, start what you want to start, and create the life you want today." (Dale Partridge)

I am guilty of this. I am guilty of dreaming of traveling far for short periods of time. I am guilty of taking what I have now for granted in my longing for what has been and what is to come. I am guilty of thinking about the future in the abstract rather than taking steps in the present to live the life that I want to live.

I am partial to making lists, as you may have noticed if you read my blog often, so I am going to create yet another. This is a list of how I am going to try to live my life hereafter.

1. I will be happy, not just on Fridays, but every day of the week. Wherever my career path takes me, I will never just slog through and deal with depression because that's "what you've got to do". I will choose joy over job security.
2. I will make being kind my life goal, rather than saving money for a house down-payment or paying down debts.
3. I will remember my reasons for being vegan - to make the world a better place for all who live on this earth human and non-human alike. It is not about being personally pure. It does not make me better than anyone else. 
4. I will put my family, my animal companions, and my friends first in everything, even when people criticize me for being a pushover. I will embrace that side of myself. I will not harden my heart. Being kind does not make me weak. 
5. I will continue to follow my passion in academia - and out of it if that is where my passion leads me. 
6. I will not occupy my mind with too many dreams about the future, nor will I dwell on the past. I will live for now. 
7. I will do my best to be flexible with my goals, my dreams, my career path, my personal deadlines, and in my interactions with others. 
8. I will not expect too much of myself or of others. I will accept myself as I am and I will accept others as they are. This does not mean, though, that I will never change - for better or worse. 
9. I will not complain about my job, my health, or my education unless I am willing to do make a change.
10. I will not search for the light at the end of the tunnel. I will take initiative, turn on a damn flashlight, and make my life good right now. 

Happy Friday! And Happy Halloween! 

-J